Happy wife, happy life?
If the woman is satisfied, then everything is fine with the relationship. This is a rule that is often repeated. But this cliché is not true.
Most people are still interested in relationships today.
If the woman is satisfied, the relationship will be smooth sailing. This has become a sort of modern wisdom in society. But the cliché that the woman acts as a »barometer« in a heterosexual relationship is not true. As an international team of researchers has now shown, the man's perceptions are also a reliable indication of satisfaction in a relationship. This is just one of many ground-breaking revelations to emerge from a long-term project on couple and family relationships known as »pairfam«.
By Sebastian Hollstein
In the 1980s, sporadic scientific findings seemed to suggest that women were more sensitive to relationship issues, allowing conclusions to be drawn about the future of relationships. But this misconception has now been corrected by an international team of psychologists, including Prof. Franz J. Neyer from the University of Jena. Their wide-ranging study proves that satisfaction within a relationship can also be predicted according to the man's perceptions. Their research results have been reported in »Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences« (PNAS).
»We're pleased to have helped dispell this cliché,« says Neyer. »It might fit into the gender stereotype that women are relationship experts or more driven by relationships, and that only their perception can be used to predict satisfaction within a relationship, but no evidence of this could be found in our systematic study. In actual fact, men's perception is just as predictive as women's«.
Psychologist and relationship expert Prof. Franz J. Neyer.
Image: Privat (private)3,400 couples monitored over five years
The researchers surveyed over 4,000 couples for the »pairfam« study. 900 of them provided diary-like entries about their relationship. The information obtained from 3,400 more couples had a more long-term scope over a period of five years. In both cases, the experts analysed the data to make predictions regarding future satisfaction within certain relationships, which then also came true.
»Our recent findings not only help to debunk social stereotypes, but also support the development of effective therapeutic methods that could help people with relationship issues,« says Neyer.
The long-term data for the study was obtained from the »pairfam« panel, which had been collecting data on intimate relationships and family dynamics in Germany since 2008 before the platform was closed after 14 years. As part of the study funded by the German Research Foundation (DFG), up to 12,000 people were surveyed each year together with their partners, parents and children. »pairfam was a highly innovative concept that included not only focus persons, but also their family environment, enabling us to study intergenerational relationships as well,« says Neyer, who spent eight years coordinating research on intimate relationships as part of the project.
There's no »undateable generation«
The first ground-breaking research results emerged even before the project had been concluded. The researchers have published over 200 articles in renowned journals. For example, »pairfam« helped to prove that there is no such thing as an »undateable generation«. »We couldn't find anything to substantiate that claim. Most people look for and have intimate relationships,« says Neyer. While the percentage of stable relationships lasting longer than a year has fallen slightly among young adults, the trend is now shifting towards shorter-term relationships, so the amount of time they are actually in a relationship is not changing. »Perhaps young adults are now more willing to experiment before ultimately committing to a long-term relationship,« suspects the psychologist from the University of Jena.
The psychologists involved in the »pairfam« project have also observed recent changes in the way people are finding partners. There has been a significant rise in the use of online dating; this mainly benefits highly educated women, who have been able to get married in greater numbers as a result.
Long-term panel to be continued in the new »FReDA« format
The long-term study has provided fresh impetus for research; the wealth of data will enable further results to be obtained for a long time to come, and international cooperation will be intensified through newly created networks. For example, psychologists from the University of Jena are cooperating with a team of Canadian researchers who are looking to develop a project similar to »pairfam« for the North American country.
And the long-term »pairfam« panel will also be continued as part of the new »Family Demography Panel Study« (»FReDA«), which will also be dedicated to the topics of relationships and family life in Germany, based at the Federal Institute for Population Research (BiB). Franz J. Neyer will continue to be involved in the project.
Information
Original publication:
Women and Men are the Barometers of Relationships: Testing the Predictive Power of Women's and Men's Relationship Satisfaction, PNAS 2022, DOI: 10.1073/pnas.2209460119External link
Franz J. Neyer, Univ.-Prof. Dr
Personality Psychology and Psychological Assessment